Searching For Me...

Perhaps the hardest thing about growing up - for me, was coming to peace with myself as a person. Which way do I lean ? Whats the best thing to do ? Whats the right thing to do ? Should I take all advise ? Or do I myself know best ? Should I follow my mind ? Or should I follow my heart ?...... By and large, a lot of these questions for me have answered themselves - what I know now is that there is no "one right path"..... there is no "5 easy steps to finding yourself"..... in retrospect, its always like the story about Honda and Buddhas eyebrows..... que sera sera.... what will be will be. This poem is a few years old..... the questions that I now ask have definitely changed, but the essential dilemma still poses itself many a times.... I guess this is what being human and growing is all about......

I'm too old to be a kid,
Too young to be a man.
Neither a prudish dude,
Nor a screaming punk.
I ain't the "traditional Indian guy",
Nor a "modern western clone".
I sometimes like the East,
And at times, the West, I love.
Sometimes an idealist,
Yet, no way, a moralist.
At times I am the obedient son,
And still sometimes a wild rebel.
A voice inside says, "Go along",
While another says, "Don't care a damn".
Who is me ?
Which am I ?
For Gods sake - Where do I stand ?